Baby Has Arrived… But So Has Jealousy… How To Cope & Maintain A Healthy Relationship Postpartum
It’s no secret that life changes once your baby has arrived. Your relationship with your partner is no different. It will change. Often, when you have gone through the journey of pregnancy and given birth to your baby, your partner can struggle with the natural closeness you and your baby have.
This, added to the fact that more of your time will be focused towards your baby, can lead to some jealousy within your new family. The phrase “three is a crowd” springs to mind.
What can this jealousy look like? And what can be done to maintain your relationship in the early stages of baby’s arrival?
They Need Constant Reassurance
Often, because you brought the baby into the world, your partner can feel as though you’re the boss. You grew your baby inside you for 9 months, therefore you automatically know exactly what to do. This can lead to your other half constantly seeking attention and approval when it comes to their new found parenting skills. This can be extremely frustrating when you have to give your baby constant attention, and now your partner now seems to crave attention more than usual. The green eyed monster can start to sink in, and problems can arise.
What To Do?
Chat with your partner and explain that this parenting thing is new to you too. You don’t have all of the answers and it’s a strain to have to constantly reassure them that they’re doing it right. They’ll probably be grateful that you’ve admitted to not having all the answers. Emphasise you’re on this journey together, you’re a team.
Photo by Seth Reese on Unsplash.
You Love Baby More
It’s common knowledge that parents will never love anything more than their babies, this can even include your partner. Whilst the love you have for your baby is different to the love you have for your partner, it can still get competitive. Your partner might feel slightly put out that this new arrival has caused a lull in your feelings towards them.
What To Do?
Remember that your new arrival is you and your partner's baby. Use this mutual love to bond and grow even closer. Both your worlds centre around your baby, remember that.
The Bickering Is At An All Time High
Postpartum means there are hormones flying about left, right and centre. You and your partner have both suffered a massive change. Throw in the jealousy that may be lingering, the sleepless nights, and lack of intimacy and we’ve got many a reason to bicker. It can be one of those niggling things where everything they do can grate on your last nerve.
What To Do?
Again, it’s about realising that while you’re feeling annoyed at your partner, they can feel the same towards you. Learning to communicate efficiently and remembering to just be kind can help a lot in these early stages of baby’s arrival. Simply saying “please” and “thank you” rather than snapping at one another can make a world of difference. For the modern couple, there are a number of apps available to help improve your relationship.
